Who Are These Punch-Out!! People?
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Amazing Origin Of King Hippo Revealed At Last

King HippoOf all of the characters in Nintendo's Punch-Out!! franchise, King Hippo is the most unusual of them all.  With his extreme weight, malformed head, and bizarre mannerisms, one wonders how Hippo came about his strange appearance.  Now (thanks to an ill-conceived product tie-in) we know the horrible truth.  Poor King Hippo has cancer caused by wearing shorts laced with traces of a hazardous chemical.  Remember that pointless Heavyweight Contender Kit sold through Amazon.com?  The one with the boxer shorts, punching bag, candy bar, and crown?  Kotaku has word that, like those belonging to the king, the shorts are contaminated.

Warning - the yellow ink printed on the boxers contains traces of a chemical known to the State of California to cause cancer.

The Heavyweight Contender Kit was already rather unnecessary, but now I think we can downgrade it even further to "poisonous".  So King Hippo has cancer then.  Now I feel sorry for knocking him out by attacking his unique vulnerable spot.  How poisonous are the other items included in the Kit?  Does the replica King Hippo crown cause hair loss and scalp pain?  Is the punching bag filled with live bees?  Has anyone eaten the Doc Louis Remedy Chocolate Bar and lived to tell the tale?