Near the end of the twentieth century I spent my senior year of high school working part time at a local hardware store.  My job was to stock shelves, mix paint, fill propane & chlorine tanks, make keys, cut glass, slice rope, and (unfortunately) interact with the hordes of clueless home improvement morons that would filter in each day in search of equipment they didn't need for projects they were incapable of completing.  The frustrated customer is a curious beast, for it is convinced that it is correct no matter how much evidence points to the contrary.  While reading stories of customer idiocy over at Not Always Right I was reminded of how much I do not miss dealing with that portion of the general public that is chronically confused.  Allow me to share some of my favorite game-related tales from that site, such as the story of the woman in search of a version of Halo 3 that is playable with a guitar controller.

Customer, flustered: “What’s the difference between Halo 3 and Guitar Hero 3, exactly?”

Me, stammering: “Uh… in Halo 3, you shoot aliens, and in Guitar Hero 3, you play rock music.”

Customer: “Oh, he’d want Halo 3, then.”

Me: “Okay, let me go and get that copy for you I left in the back.”

(After grabbing it…)

Customer: “Where’s the guitar?”

(At this point, to spare the readers, I went through the ENTIRE conversation again.)

Customer: “But someone on the phone told us you had the Halo 3 Special Edition.”

Me: “Yes, we do, that’s this in my ha–”

Customer: “So why aren’t you selling it to me? I want it with the guitar.”

Me, stifling laughter: “Ma’am, look, I can’t really say it any clearer. We have Halo 3. Halo 3 is not played with a guitar. We do NOT have Guitar Hero 3. Guitar Hero 3 is played with a guitar.”

Customer: “Oh for god’s sake. We drive all the way here and you people don’t even know what the **** you’re talking about. I’m going to Best Buy.”

Me: “You do that, ma’am.  Have a nice day!”

Please enjoy these other similar stories:

• A Nasty Case Of Selective Illiteracyosis
• And The Cases Serve Their Purpose
• Ask And Ye Shall Receive
• How A DS Killed The ESRB
• Y, Will, Y Will, Rock U!
• Because Everything On The Internets Is Private

(Image via Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Soda)